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Deuce Bigalow, Zoolander, Sexy Beast, Amelie, Mallrats, Bandits, Spider Man (09 May 2002 at 12:24)
OK, time for some more movie reviews!

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo - This is exactly the same movie as The Animal. It had some funny bits, and satisfied me as far as bad movies go. By the way, all gigolos are male.

Zoolander - Like a long episode of the (new) Simpsons with all the jokes removed. You're waiting to laugh, but it never comes. BAD MOVIE: DO NOT WATCH

Sexy Beast - Genre: British Crimes-gone-wrong. It's pretty hard to understand what those damn limeys are saying in this movie. The character of Don Logan (Ben Kingsley) is one of the biggest badasses ever on-screen. "Lock Stock" and "Snatch" were both better.

Amelie - One of the best movies I've seen. It's every bit as beautiful as City of Lost Children but it has characters you care about and loads more inspiration. Jean-Pierre Jeunet is a genius. I won't tell you anything about it, so you'll just have to watch.

Bandits - OK movie where everything goes right for the bumbling criminals. Bruce Willis should stick to Die Hard sequels, though.

Mallrats - Some have said that this is Kevin Smith's crappiest, and I think I agree. It's totally overscripted, and with the exception of Jay, none of the characters pull it off. If you get annoyed at people who use phrases like "wax intellectual" or say "said" as in "Anything outside of said designated square," then you will be annoyed at the dialogue in this movie, too.

Spider Man - Why does everybody think this movie is so good? Maybe it's just my bad experience watching it (power outage; got to see the first 20 minutes twice), but I thought this was just a regular lame-ass superhero movie. Good: choreography of fight scenes. Amusing: Use of phrase "cash money" by newspaper honcho, subtle (?) web-slinging masturbation metaphor. Retarded: melodrama, "helpful" flashbacks, scientific computer displays, script, acting. Especially retarded: the Green Goblin's power ranger costume.
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Mils Yobtaf (milsyobtaf (at) austin (... (cs666889-48.austin.rr.com) – 05.10.02 01:09:33
ok, so im reading this, and im following you up until i get to mallrats - now, admittedly it wasnt smith's best movie, but blame for that can be attributed to the pressure put on him by the studios to top clerks, a tall order indeed... the dialogue was a bit over the top on purpose, i believe, to add a bit of juxtaposition between the "mallrats" and the "normals"... and spiderman? i was weaned at the teat of the marvel, with the assorted x-titles and spidey as my numero uno flavors... and this was quite a faithful rendition of the comic books... much much better than any previous comic book movie, with the exception of tim burton's batman flicks, which were more burton movies than batman ones... the melodrama, flashbacks, et al that you rag on as retarded are staples of comic books, and raimi bringing said attributes to the movie is a credit to his directing style. ok, im all ranted out... cheerio, and have fun with agfa and monotype ;-)
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Marc (sar67.resnet.usf.edu) – 05.10.02 23:44:57
Goddam you watch a lot of movies, Tom. Well, I watch far fewer (I think only one so far this year), but I did see a really good one last weekend, so perhaps I ought to recommend it. It's called "Y Tu Mama También." Okay, there you have it, my recommendation. Oh, if you do watch, give it a bit of a chance because you might (like I did) think that's it's not going to be too good after seeing the first 20 or 30 minutes of it.
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Tom 7 (user-112025l.dsl.mindspring.com) – 05.11.02 01:45:43
Mils: well, I guess I did enjoy Mallrats after all, I'm just saying that it has its downsides. I agree that the Batman movies were definitely better, but I thought X-Men was better, too. Maybe I just wasn't in the mood?

I've heard other good things about 'y tu mama tambien', marc, I guess I should check it out...

(PS. I watch so many movies because I can watch bad movies while doing work.)
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